015                                                                                                      11 January 2017


We are all here to live every situation you can imagine, good or bad; right or wrong; positive or negative. Why? So we can learn from the experience as part of the adventure of life.  Murray Kibblewhite

STORY – YEAR 24 – Leftover Woman

Michael and Belinda are on a train talking about her experiences of moving from a rural area of China to the capital Beijing so her mother could take up a position. The timing was difficult as she and her twin sister were at secondary school and the break from their friends was heart-wrenching as was the difficulty of making new friends at the new school.

Her father was an oil engineer and worked away from home for two months then came home for one month. She was not close to him. Then there was the competition with her twin sister made settling in challenging.

After attending University in Beijing Belinda got a job in a bank and after several years she left and followed her boyfriend to New Zealand where, within six months, he dumped her. So she got herself a Kiwi boyfriend following the pattern of her twin sister who was now living in Frankfurt with her German boyfriend.

Eventually with Michael’s help she got a job in a New Zealand bank, she left her boyfriend and within two years she had bought her own home in the suburbs. Then she started looking for another boyfriend. While she was courageous and independent having achieved much, by Chinese standards she was “sheng nu” – a leftover woman!

Check out the complete story at

 Learnings– Belinda through her many challenges learnt courage and independence but at the price of acceptance by the society she had left.

All life’s experiences are opportunities to learn. The challenge is to decide, what are the real lessons to be learnt?

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